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Exploring the Line Between Confidence and Cockiness

Is this a slippery slope?

Can one remain humble while embodying strength in their skills and talents?

Does excessive confidence lead directly to laziness?

Is it possible to be resolutely self-assured without becoming overly directive towards others?

Does an unshakeable belief in oneself lead to missing important information?

Brene Brown’s definition of hubris and humility shines a much needed light on these questions.

“Hubris is an inflated sense of one’s own innate abilities that is tied more to the need for dominance than to actual accomplishments. Humility is openness to new learning combined with a balanced and accurate assessment of our contributions, including our strengths, imperfections, and opportunities for growth.”

I propose that false confidence stems from seeing oneself as separate from a greater intelligent consciousness, potentially leading to hubris. This false confidence may just stem from a diminished sense of awe and wonder of Life.

Let’s use pregnancy and childbirth as a metaphor. In our modern times, it might be easy to take for granted the formation of a baby and their birth. Science has dulled the mystery and the miracle of this process. For a moment, set aside your current knowledge and imagine a world 3000 years in the past. Imagine the awe and wonder of a fully formed human being emerging from a woman. From this point of view, we remember that we do not know how to create life. We might know how a life is created but cannot create life with our will, with our minds, with our hands. It would be hubris to believe that we could.

Continuing with this mystical event on a forest floor where there is a woman squatting in complete trust and confidence that her body knows what it needs to do, that it was created to do this. Imagine her wise women tribe with her, holding space, supporting if needed, trusting alongside their sister. All confident in the miracle of life. The most natural thing to do. Yielding to a greater intelligence beyond our intellect.

If we look at our talents and skills through the same lens, we might cozy up with humility and authentic confidence. When we remain humble in the face of the miracle of the life we inhabit and trust in the mystery of life moving through us, we can then show up for ourselves and others with an assuredness that transcends one’s own identity. And from here, there is no need for striving, pushing, controlling, laziness, or imposter syndrome. Instead, we allow, surrender, trust, and support in a way that nurtures our best selves, and in doing so, we serve humanity in return.

As your Somatic Spiritual Coach, I set my compass within our shared space, trusting in this intelligence of Life and, by extension, in your inner wisdom. This journey leads you to discover your own Truth and Authenticity.


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